This Is ME!

I’m an extravert, a people lover, I’m obsessed with relationships.  I love deeply and unrelentingly.  I’m fiercely loyal. I love anything that sparkles. I love music and dance.  I can’t draw or paint.  To decorate I need Pinterest. I’m scared to death of sharks.  (Like after I saw Jaws, I couldn’t get in the tub for a year.) Most people would say I’m pretty funny.  Probably came from watching too much I Love Lucy when I was a kid.

I would call myself a Power Mother.  Meaning Mothering has been my passion and the thing I’ve dedicated my life to.  That doesn’t mean I’m a perfect Mother. Just that my whole heart and soul is dedicated to it.  I didn’t have that personally.  My Mother was not there for me.  The suffering that came, because of not having my Mother dedicated to me, has been the driving force behind my love of being the best Mother I can be.

I would say that my passion now is helping other women move through transition and trauma in their lives.  To sum up the last 10 years…picture me looking heavenward and saying…REALLY????  I’ve done that many times.

I hope my experiences and insight help you in some way.  I hope I can be a safe place for you.  I hope my writing and videos make you laugh, cry, but mostly I hope to help you.  Helps you feel hope and empowered.

Love You!

Instead of worrying about who loves you…who accepts you…who you’re number one to…why didn’t they love you?  How about spending your time thinking about ways to love you.

Things to change in order to love yourself.  Habits to create to love you better.  Set up your life, thoughts, habits to love yourself better.  When you love you…those who should be in your life..will be.  Those that aren’t in your life…aren’t suppose to be.  Love yourself and just let things be as they are.  

When you love you…you’ll have that peace to accept things for what they are.  You’ll not feel the need to try to control situations and other people.  Let go of looking to others to fulfill your needs.  You will fill you up.  Then and only then, will everything flow.

Things I Didn't Know!

                                                

Personal hygiene and care has also reached a new level of intensity.  I had never heard of a woman shaving her pubic hair, much less having wax slabbed on her pubic region and ripped off.  I first became aware of this practice when my daughters informed me that it was “gross” to not participate in this new ritual.  At first blush, I was appalled and shocked to know that my children were actively shaving their pubic hair in the shower. After I recovered from the shock of this new information.  Having been informed that “everyone” does it.  I called my cousin, who is always ahead of me,  in all things hip and new.  She’s my age and I fully expected her to be as upset and shocked as I was.  After spewing out my story I waited, legs crossed sitting on the edge of my bed. There was silence on the other end of the phone, then she said…you don’t groom yourself down there?  I was horrified!!  What????? Am I suppose to be????? Well… she said… it is kinda gross not to.  Are you kidding me??? The shame started to set in.  How was it that I was so uninformed???  Why was I not told that this was expected now?? She continued the interrogation.  So, you just let it grow all natural down there?  Yes, I guess so.  I mean I do shave up upper thighs during the summer time.  Does that count?  I asked in a tentative voice.  Silence then a deep sigh.  If you don’t want to shave it,  at least trim it! She fired back.  TRIM IT????? How in the hell do I do that????  Do I grab the kitchen sheers and just start cutting away?  Do I work across or up and down?  What length is acceptable?  My mind was racing.  Then she carefully asked, she could tell this conversation was not going well.  So, your husband hasn’t ever said anything?  NO!  Now I was in a complete panic.  Had I unknowingly subjected him to a jungle safari everytime….Ok I can’t talk about this.  I’ll talk to you later I said.

I needed time to process this information.  

The next day I went to the local drug store in search of supplies to get myself “in shape”  I saw the Nair.  I thought, this seems easy enough.  Smear this stuff on and I’m clean as a whistle.  I went home,  applied it as directed.  Nothing!  I waited and waited.  Ok I’m gonna need to go in with a razor I thought.  I grabbed one I found in the shower.  I had a fleeting thought that the owner of the razor probably wouldn’t appreciate this.  But, I soldiered on.  No trimming for me I thought.  I’m going in hard on this!  I realized that shaving in that area is not as easy as one would think.  Especially when one can’t see the area very well because…you get the picture.  So I shaved….pretty much by “brail”.  There was blood at times and it was quite a project. In the end..I prevailed!  I stepped out of the shower proudly and cast my eyes toward my once unruly pubic area.  I gasped!  Who am I??? I didn’t know what to think.  I felt naked.  Weird.  But strangely free.  I walked around for days like I had a secret.  I heard the song “If you want my body and you think I’m sexy”  in the background of all I did for a few days.  I walked with a strut.  A new found confidence emerged.  I was no longer in the dark ages.  I was a progressive woman. 

Then, the itching started.